Divisions of Death – Gridiron Maidens


Taxederm and sons (all deceased) are Undead investment bankers, in looking to improve the synergistism, leadership/teamwork and out of the box thinking of their staff by undertaking team building exercises. Blood bowl was chosen at random out of a live humans stomach, most were disappointed it wasn’t “Producivity simulations” (gathering human infants to be devoured by the ghouls and leaving their skeletons to develop scale models for small scale simulations of market dynamics), but reactions soon changed when ‘C.E.O John Dowling’ (deceased) suggested that this could be used to forward their other interest, a strong portfolio in funeral and medical services.

So it was decided, and they carried their Corporate moniker onto the pitch. The amateur team set were against equally fresh Amazon Gridiron Maidens.

The heat had no effect on the Undead but 2 of the Amazon players were out with heat exhaustion but regardless the GI Maidens looked to run rings around the bankers. Only a daring gambit by the ghoul lawyer ‘Briar Smith Attorney at law’ stood between the Amazons an an early touchdown, he served papers long enough for the “cease and desist order” to be enacted and flatten a number of players, during both my Taxederm’s and Gridiron’s turns. The fourth turn saw injury but mostly the ball got ignored deep in Taxederms defensive zone for the first half replaced with a brawl which resulted in no-one getting hurt badly.

The second half saw 2 deaths, one from an Amazon tripping over while running too fast, another when faced between simply knocking out an aggressor ‘C.O.O Aaron Scott’ decided to lie on his back too… despite it not being needed (face palm here) to promote an equal opportunities agenda. They both laid down dead on the pitch on the for some time, then Aaron Scott got back up again, the Gridiron player didn’t for more obvious reasons.

But, due to quick thinking by the ghoul ‘Prosecutor Marcus Phillips’ realise a loop hole and quickly sought action against the Gridiron end zone, this was halted when his motion was blocked by a foot to the face but a collection of his peers supported his action and he ended the dead lock with a touchdown and filed for negligence against the Amazon defence.

By the last 2 turns only 5 Amazons were standing and the 10 investment bankers and associates were delivering a seminar on coffin suggestions and medical supplies, no transactions were completed.

Result: Taxederm 1 – 0 Grid Iron Maidens
Casualties: 1 injured zombie (no effect), 2 dead Amazons, 2 injured Amazons(effects unclear)

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